#CancelCulture is killing conflict resolution.
For the last five or so years, our society has adopted a mindset of cutting out, or canceling, people who have committed an indiscretion, said something inappropriate, had differing opinions, or simply hurt our feelings. Even if the indiscretion is many years old, we are prone to pounce, deleting people from our lives quicker than we can tweet out the news. While accountability towards morally wrong actions is appropriate, where is the reconciliation? How can someone who makes a mistake be brought back into the fold in a healthy way? We are quick to dismiss but slow to reconcile. In the era of #CancelCulture, we are creating a generation of people unwilling and unable to reconcile broken relationships.
This should be alarming for leaders in the workplace. Conflicts in the workplace are already costing US businesses a staggering amount each year. According to a study conducted by Consulting Psychology Press, Inc., workers spend approximately 2.8 hours of work every week dealing with conflict. From a cost standpoint, this equates to around $359 BILLION a year in lost productivity. Now, what happens to this cost when the #CancelCulture generation takes over the workplace? Without the ability to resolve conflict in a healthy way, we could start to see:
- Increased workplace stress
- Increased employee turnover
- Increased employee absenteeism from
- Decreased employee engagement
- Deceased productivity
You aren’t helpless, however. #CancelCulture isn’t a death sentence for your workplace. There are four things leaders can do to restore healthy conflict resolution in the workplace:
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Don’t Assume Employees Understand How to Resolve Conflicts
One of the most dangerous things a leader can do in the workplace is to assume their employees know how to resolve conflict in a healthy way. This may seem like something learned in elementary school, but the reality is our culture has shifted so drastically in the last 10-15 years that conflict resolution is no longer a guaranteed skill. The rise of technology has created a generation of people addicted to smartphones, which studies have shown to increase social isolation, depression, and anxiety. The need to develop in-person relational skills, including conflict resolution, is diminished when conflicts can be avoided by simply refusing to text someone back. Once someone enters the workforce, however, these interpersonal skills that are under-developed up to this point rear their ugly heads.
Leaders can help solve this problem by offering direct and pointed conflict resolution training. In the same Consulting Psychology Press, Inc. study, they found that 60% of all US employees have never received conflict resolution training. However, of those who have been trained, 95% said it helped them positively navigate conflict. If you don’t have the resources within your business to provide this training, invest in an external leadership coach to provide training for your team.
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Connect Conflict Resolution to Mission, Vision, and Values
Conflict resolution isn’t just for world peace: it’s for organizational success, too. We need each other at work. It doesn’t work to have coworkers constantly at each other’s throats, or actively avoiding one another due to conflict. If you want to draw employees out of conflict and onto a path of resolution and reconciliation, point them to the greater purpose.
One of the most important factors for positive work experiences for employees is finding a sense of meaning and purpose at work. When you connect conflict resolution to your business’s mission, vision, and values, you are tapping into that purpose and meaning so many workers are craving at work. Here, conflict resolution isn’t just making nice with another person, it’s to further the mission of your company. When you elevate conflict resolution to this level, it helps people see beyond themselves and focused their attention on a greater purpose.
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Model Healthy Disagreements and Resolution
Kristin Bell and Dax Sheppard, one of Hollywood’s most famous married couples, recently said that whenever they fight in front of their children, they also reconcile with one another in front of their children. For them, it’s important that their children learn not only how to disagree well, but to also resolve conflict well. Leaders need to take the lead in modeling healthy conflict resolution.
As the leader, you hold incredible power and sway over how people act within your company. However, you aren’t a robot: you WILL have conflicts with others. By showing employees how to best resolve conflict, you can set the tone for what you expect others to do. How can you do this well? Take Kristin and Dax’s lead: don’t resolve conflicts in hiding. Do it in front of others where they can study your actions, demeanor, and words. If you can’t resolve conflict in front of people, talk about why conflict existed in the first place, and what you did to resolve it. Then, as mentioned in the previous step, connect it to your company’s core ideology.
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Build a Culture that Reinforces Reconciliation not Cancellation
Does your workplace culture support healthy conflict resolution or relational cancellation? No matter how often you as the leader model healthy disagreements and conflict resolution, if your workplace culture does not support and reinforce conflict resolution and reconciliation, it will not happen. Workplace culture can feel like a hands-off venture, but leaders have an enormous say over the type of culture that exists in the workplace. By naming core values, reinforcing them through training and discussion, then protecting them from being harmed or mishandled, you can create a culture that emphasizes reconciliation over cancellation.
Conflict is a natural part of life and will continue to be a natural part of your workplace. Don’t shy away from it, but embrace it for the advantages it can bring. Focus on supporting your people by providing the necessary training, connecting conflict resolution to your company’s core ideology, modeling healthy disagreements and resolutions, and building a culture that supports it all. #CancelCulture doesn’t have to infect your workplace relationships. Help your people restore reconciliation to their common language, and see conflict resolution soar in your workplace once again.
If you need help with conflict resolution and leadership development, contact me today and let’s talk.